LDR

hallo. december used to be my month. tp skrg udh ngga.





have you ever felt so lonely eventhough you have friends? so lonely that you don't feel like talking to anybody else?





yagitulah rasanya ldr sm temen. ini ngebahas ldr sm tmn dan semacamnya, bukan cowo ya. I'm single dan apa salahnya single?




ldr sama tmn itu gakebayang. dulu yang dari sd sampe smp kita selalu sama sama, di sma misah. dan skrg gue mau pindah gatau harus kmn. banyak faktor yang harus dipikirin mateng - mateng. dan gacuma faktor temen aja sih. sekolah A atau B sekarang gabisa gue putusin. staying at buls is never the option.




kalo ldr tuh we'll get to the point that we feel like losing people. sebenernya mereka ada di sekitar kita. tapi ntah mager atau gamau cerita, kita jd males. atau mungkin kita udh gabisa percaya lagi?




kalo ada org lain nny gue knp pasti gue jwb 'nah I'm fine'. reason is, gamau org lain tau ngeduluin kalian. but how could they do the first move, instead of you?




sekalinya gue cerita gadidengerin. dianggurin. dikacangin. some of them only heard half of what I said. ada jg yg sambil main hp. hey I'm still alive here, people. unless I'm invisible. you heard me talking, needing you but you didn't ever bother answering. jadi sakit sendiri. selama ini udh nahan loh. bagi mereka yang masih gue percaya, you can consider yourself lucky.




katanya 'no more hiding feelings'. tp kalo udh nyoba buka diri tp gadidengerin gue bakal nutup diri lg. kalo gue nya udh nutup diri pasti mikirnya gue marah. gamarah kok. I just want you to hear, are you willing to do that even only for a second? mau lo gajawab itu gapapa. but at least hear me first. gue pgn jg kali diperhatiin. mentang - mentang sekolah gue paling jauh yakan.




'ini cm masalah jarak kok......'





bukan jarak yang bikin masalah.




ada yg blg gue yg ngejauh. kalo gue yg ngejauh sih gabakal kali gue nanya 'ada apa?', 'gmn kabar lo?'. faktanya gue selalu duluan yg nanya. I always do the first move.




and when I say 'I miss you' I really mean it.




but above all. there's someone, named 'nobody' that shows up when everybody doesn't. that nobody stands beside me, cheers me up eventhough they know it would never change anything. don't ever let me trust nobody above friends, k?




don't ever let me stay lonely at buls. and don't ever let me doing monologue with my blog all the time. I need those people who have been with me at least for 3 years. question is, is this happening the other way around too?




make yourself useful.